I drank again last night. Sixes and Sevens is a bad influence. My night started off relatively healthy. I went to the gym, ran 3.4 miles on a 3% incline, came home and hopped in the shower. Then I got a text that said, “Wine? Champagne?” Damn you evil temptress. I was doing so well!
I grabbed my booze and my dogs, and went over to her place, stopping to bang on the King of the Dog Park’s window on the way. He opened it up and said he would meet me at Sixes and Seven’s house shortly. All of this drinking ensured that I would get home late, drunk, and be late for work today. But, it was a good thing. Driving to work an hour later than my usual time, I stopped at a red light downtown. I looked to my right and saw two men of the blue collar variety standing on the sidewalk talking to another guy whose face I couldn’t see.
These two guys were the hottest specimen I’ve seen in this city since I moved here. I wish I had my camera because I would have most definitely taken a picture. I seriously could not stop looking. Of course, it got the little squirrel in my brain thinking about something.
Growing up in Connecticut, and hanging out in the bars and clubs in New York City and Long Island, good looking men outnumbered the rodents in the city. Every night out yielded a handful of phone numbers from men who I would juggle for months to come. I then moved to Atlanta, and while the general look of Atlantans was different, there were still many hot men to feast the eyes on.
Then I moved here. Hollywood for the ugly. Why are we all so unattractive? I just don’t get it. Am I hanging out in the wrong places? Is it the whole city or just pockets? And good lord, am I becoming ugly by osmosis? I’m really at a loss. By New York City standards, the guys this morning would have blended in. Both about 6 feet tall, light to medium brown hair, one with some unshaven scruff, rough in a take-me-tame-me way, and not manorexic. They spend time at the gym without getting bulky and steroided up. They have the look that they actually play sports instead of watching them on t.v. They stand out in a city washed with “sameness” enough for me to slam on my brakes and stare without fear of getting caught.
When I moved here, my definition and standard of what was good looking changed without my knowledge or approval. The guys in D.C. fall into a few categories. Either he is the nerdy hipster with the trademark black frame glasses who looks like he hasn’t washed his clothes since “Like a Virgin” was number 1, or he’s the politico who spends too much time at the office going bald and not spending enough time exercising off his pot belly. If he doesn’t fall into one of the two above categories, then he has most likely become metrosexual. By process of elimination, I embraced the metrosexual look. I liked the guy who paid attention to what he looked like, bought the Seven jeans, and generally acted a bit gay when appropriate. But that hasn’t worked out so well for me. I just can’t emasculate the man I’m with. And the other types? Well, I’m just not the hipster kind of girl. And the politico? No thanks. I’ll choose celibacy.
But seeing this guy this morning just reminded me where I came from, what I grew up finding attractive and the kind of guy who I am most suited to be with. It’s more workman with toolbelt and less suits and briefcases. It’s more driving an F350 to work and less bike riding with the backpack in tow. It’s more Dane Cook, and less Buddy Holly, Carson Daly or Chris Robinson.
Aah, Dane Cook.
Dane…yummmmy
Good gd you know how I feel about this one. As the lover of pretty and scruffy men, I haven’t YET found one in the entire city that isn’t shorter than me, cocky, or a nerdy hipster besides my ex….Maybe that’s why I’m having such a hard time getting over him.
Wicked, I’ll share him with you!
KK – I KNEW you would be one of the first to comment on this. I miss the Longuysland and Jerz guys. Miss them!!! MISS THEM!!!!
Ok, I had to modify my answer…I MEANT TO SAY…shorter than me (while I have heels on)…in heels I am almost 5’11. I have met a ton of adorable shorter guys in the city but I need a taller guy…just bc being with someone small makes me feel big. 🙂
You had me with the Poison headline.
This seals the deal. I need to move to DC.
Thanks V, so very generous of you.
When can I expect him???
This is me resisting taking over the comments today.
Write it down, so when I break character you’ll know how long it took.
When I was wandering the streets of Manhattan I noticed all sorts of good looking women but never did I think “man, she’s hotter than any girl in DC” – and believe me I was looking.
I66 – I think it may be my neighborhood. I need to get out of there. The guy this a.m. was wearing a Maryland shirt, so he has to be from the ‘burbs somewhere. Must. Find. Him. Manhattan can be hit or miss, because there are so many transplants there. If you get out into the suburbs up there, you find much more differences. And you can take over the comments. That was hilarious.
Wicked H – I have to stalk him first.
Minijon – Come on! We have room for more we do we do!
You do live in Dupont, you realize.
Jeeez…fine!
Virtue and patience…..whatever!
There are attractive men nearby where I live…but they’re all deaf. And 5 years younger than me.
I used to live in Northern England. Those men are REALLY ugly.
DC is a pretty ugly city on both sides. Truly beautiful women are a rarity, and my standards have dropped a notch or two since I got here myself.
I’m pretty damn cute, though. 😉
I am from Savannah,went to college in Texas,lived in a few different cities before landing in DC..have been involved in conversations on this very subject…I guess what I would like to see more of is some gentlemanly character. It’s rare that I see a man around these parts that stops me in my tracks based on looks, I gave up on that long ago.. it’s even rarer to stumble across a gentleman. It may be my roots…(Rednecks turn me off, but the places they hang out at don’t, just as long as no one blows smoke in my face or points a gun in my direction..I digress)..it would be nice to have some eye candy around here, however give me a man with some manners and a sense of humor any day.
Having said that I would turn that Dane dude over like a two minute steak..
..what corner did you see those hotties at this am?
Dammit, Velvet, I’m mad at you. I’ve had “Talk Dirty To Me” stuck in my head for the last hour now, and while it’s definitely better than the alternatives, I’m feeling the urge to talk dirty to someone, and I don’t have any worthy options who’ve made it that far yet.
I66 – I went to Cleveland Park once and it wasn’t much better. Wait. I’ve been there twice. And helloooo Chi-Cha lounge. It’s where the ugly and their homing pigeons all meet up.
Wicked H – I’ll let you go first!
Kat – Okay, so I can’t move to Northern England. Noted. I also read your post about the guy trying to talk to you on H street and maybe he was deaf – too funny!
LMNt – See, I think I have hot girlfriends though. Maybe I’m biased.
Elizabeth – Oh, yeah, there are very few gentlemen here. Very few. That I66 Chap is pretty good though!
LMNt – May I recommend the JACK FM streaming? I’ve been jamming all day to all sorts of 80’s hair bands.
Oh. Hotties were on 17th between L and M. West side of the street. In front of a little deli with a neon sign in the window that says “Subs.” My drool is still in the road.
YAY!!!
I’ve been hitting the gym, lifting weights – I mean, pumping some serious iron. I’ve got some stamina. Real staying power. Come back tomorrow and you’ll still see me in a pool of my own goodness.
Just hope she doesn’t get pissed and propel me in your direction. I stay with you for life.
Thanks, Velv.
And that’s I-66 chap. Not to be confused with I-66’s chaps, which don’t actually exist.
This has been an I-66 Public Service Announcement. Keep the HOV jokes to yourself.
Um, I said I was drooling. But I didn’t say it was from my mouth. So, “saliva” might not be the right word…
So how did that get in the road?
For fun and stuff, don’t you all love it when you catch a dirty pig whore on your blog looking for herself mentioned in cached pages, so you block the IP address from her Texas location, then, she comes on with a proxy that shows up so obviously that you have to laugh that she is just so pathetic? Actually, no, pathetic would be someone who copied things out of their stats, saved it as a PDF file, then emailed it to their enemy with some nonsense about how they saw them on their silly little blog that day.
Mystery of Lewis Law Firm simultaneously solved.
That’s all.
Smells familiar.
I’m not sure what’s weirder–your stat-checking or someone else’s cache-stalking.
And damn girl you must get seriously wet.
Oh checking stats is fun to see what people google to find you. Like when someone googled “burn a clit off” and found me. Awesome. Or it’s fun when you have a crazy person who will go to such lengths to read your blog, when if they just came on with a regular IP you probably wouldn’t notice them.
I don’t know if I’d call that second part “fun”, but it’s something that’s definitely good to know.
HA CLIT BURNING HAHAHAHAHAHA
When I use the word “fun,” it’s a bit tongue-in-(Dane-Cook’s)-cheek.
The other day I got a search for “pics of asian girls being groped”
See Kat? Now you’ll be looking at your stats all the time! It can be as fun as watching t.v., which, um, I don’t really do, so I wouldn’t know.
Every now and again I get a fun search show up, but mostly because I use song lyrics for my titles, I get people googling for the lyrics to a certain song and they end up on my site.
I66 – Where are your Asian girls being groped? Keeping them in a closet?
Ugh… I’ve been getting Tim McGraw Gin n Juice hits ever since I mentioned it in a post about hip hop infiltrating other musical genres… It hurts because I hate country music like Mrs. White hated Yvette and it sheds light on the fact that people are actively looking for the song.
No searches for the Snoop version of the song, which is infinitely superior. Just once I’d like a hit for the “white guy” version of the song.
Oh, and I don’t have any Asian girls. I like my girls like my cheese.
That must have been a pretty lonely little law firm on Christmas Eve..glad you figured that one out…clit burning is a whole ‘nother mystery to me..I can’t help it, now I am going to google it and see what pops up..
Hot guys notwithstanding, take it from me, it’s still hard to find a decent man in NY. Mind you, we girls outnumber them 2 to one, so the suckers are happy with the odds and play the field accordingly. And if you add to that the fact that even if there are sooo many men one has a specific type that one likes better… the number of possibilities gets even smaller. Maybe I should move to Italy, where I got hit on -literally- on almost every street corner. Sigh…
In Spain I’d walk into a bar and within 10 minutes someone would try sticking his tongue in my mouth.
Happened a coupla times in France too. Maybe American men just need to learn to be more aggressive.
It went back to a post where I did a quiz a few weeks back, and wrote something about Samantha from Sex and the City (a show I loathe) would have burned her clit off by now. Whatever they googled, I was the only hit there for it.
Kat? Are you advising just try to stick our tongues in your mouths?
Damn! Another day of no high scholarly production due to Velvet-comments addiction. Now I keep refreshing the page to see what new stuff has appeared.
Kat, I know what you mean. My fellow latin (meaning spanish or otherwise spanish-speaking) men are that aggressive. Which can be a good or a bad thing, depending on the mood, I guess. Did they also get offended if you rebuked them? They tend to do that too.
It was a good way to quickly gauge interest. You either got slapped or…not. Made someone a lot more interesting or a lot less.
I wouldn’t advocate it as a steady practice, but pulling it once in a while could potentially up the hot factor…
Hm… New Years Eve here I come!
well come over to Swann because there are an extraordinary number of plumbers on our street today. One of them is pretty damn cute….fight you for him!
Where are all the red headed men? Any red heads out there looking for a date?
Sex and the City…a show I loathe,too..so I googled clit burning…nasty..I need a barf bag..one of the more interesting things I came across was a MYSPACE blog..the dudes interests are fucking, music, and weed…his last entry was the day after Xmas..must be illin’ cuz his last entry was all about some nasty penis discharge and stuff and one of the commentors was sure he had syphillis:( cack.
Check please.
Something tells me that, hot or not, if I tried Kat’s “European-Lovah” method in the U.S. I’d end up on the sex offender’s list faster than you could say “Rickee Bobbee” with a faux french accent.
V, thanks for the gym-mention. I’d forgotten to go and was working on my first Rolling Rock of the day. Now it’s off to the gym.
…where I will not stick my tongue down any woman’s throat.
Elizabeth, um, eau! That is grrrross.
If a guy was decent looking and jammed his tongue in my mouth, I’d kiss back. But not a girl, so don’t none of you on the Lesbian fence be getting any ideas.
Sixes and Sevens – Plumbers on the street, and uh, want me to go and delete your street name out of there? You might get a stalker. Or maybe you want them to stalk you, since they usually run away from you?
Do these scruffy tall guys eat sushi?
Guess I’m out then.
😛
I’ve been told I have a real knack for clearing a room 🙂
Is that a flatulence reference?
After a couple of beers it could be a toss up between that and bawdy talk..speaking of flatulence I ran into one of the raunchiest expulsions EVER in New York last week..between the thought of that and clit burning I’m thinking sticking my tongue down a strangers throat doesn’t sound so bad.
My sister’s yorkie has some awful gas. You never see it coming, but it suddenly comes over you and suffocates you. Only then do you realize why the dog suddenly ran from the room just seconds before you got a whiff.