Normally my dreams are of the plane crashing, dogs dying, pulling super long snot out of my nose variety. But, you’re haunting me again. Whether you’re following me around London or I’m sneaking into your house, you are still haunting me.
This time, I was sitting in a cafe at the window, eating my lunch, alone. My cell phone rang. Even though your number is no longer programmed in my phone, I recognized it and answered trying to sound non-chalant. You couldn’t seem to clear your voice, and I couldn’t understand a word you were saying. Trying as hard as you could, you just couldn’t seem to get the words out and eventually I hung up.
Then you walked into the cafe and sat down next to me, explaining that you were calling to tell me you saw me through the window. You were much friendlier than I was used to. It was a change from your normally serious disposition. You said that you had broken up with your girlfriend, and mentioned something about getting together. I sat there, facing you, knowing that I have waited for this moment for over a year. I knew that I was at the crossroads, and we could go back, or we could forge ahead. You were waiting for an answer.
I said, “No.”
We gathered our things and left the cafe. As you crossed at the corner, I said, “It never would have been like I wanted it to be, would it?” You shook your head, turned back around and walked home.
I get it.
i think it’s interesting how your dreams are never about you two getting back together (yeah, one of them started out like that but ended badly) or just re-enactments of the good times had.
this, believe it or not, is a good thing.. happy dreams would only mess up with your head.. i know this last one must be making you wonder ‘why the hell am i still dreaming about him?’, but.. notice how on this one YOU had the upper hand, YOU were in control, YOU said no.. i think your head is trying to tell you something.. and as you said.. you get it.. 🙂
I used to have dreams all the time, twice a night even, about my ex-fiance after we broke up. It was so disturbing. But the thing was, I was never happy in the dreams even, and when he was nice in them, it totally surprised me. It was what I had wanted, but in the dreams, when he was actually that person, I didn’t want him then either. I even had one about him last night. He was holding my face and telling me how much he wanted me, and I just sat there. No emotions, except for no.
I got it too.
I’m sorry you’re having these dreams. I know how disturbing they can be.
It’s upsetting. I have the exact same dreams. Except in mine, Chuck Norris is trying to get me back with the Ab Lounge. I say “No.” I get it.
Sorry about the dreams. You have my anonymous, loyal-reader sympathies. Just when you think you’ve crested the summit of Everest, that damn Hillary Step takes a little longer than you think.
Strangely enough, it does sound like you are getting over him. You did say “no” in the dream.
Mmm…powerful. If that dream were mine, I wouldn’t have been strong enough to say no.
Wow.
I wish I had dreams like that. Mine are filled with so much symbolic nonsense that it gives me headaches if I think about them.
Clarity is something that we chase, to have it delivered is magical.
Cheers Velvet
Wow. You couldn’t ask for a clearer message.
do you ever wake up crying in this kind of dream – i do and that is when you know the sadness is too deep.
hopefully – you will look back someday and not feel anything but glad you have moved on. only love those that love you!
wow, that wasn’t easy. good for you. and yeah, there’s one guy’s cell # that i can’t seem to forget either (eventhough it’s been out of my phone for a couple years).
…another vision of love that seems to be true…
Really interesting. It’s like your mind needed closure so you did it yourself in your subconscience. If only I could make that happen with an old ex-boyfriend’s whose cell number is still stuck in my head.
Wow.
You really are getting it, and that’s good. You probably needed this.
Check out my post today – about Craigslist…
Anon was me – Mappy B. Sorry, it’s not letting me log in.
http://www.mappyb.blogs.com
The mind is a mysterious thing. I think this dream tells you a lot. As all of those before me have said, you are making the choice in this dream and you are saying no. I think the A HA! Lighbulb moment (not the A HA band moment… cause only I have those moments) was when you said “It never would have been like I wanted it to be, would it?” and he shook his head. This tells you no matter how much love you have for this person, you realize it never will … be.
I used to dream about my ex – I had vivid reoccuring dreams about him being in another relationship before I found out he was in one; I had dreams where I was begging for him to take me back, etc.. The last dream I had of him, I didn’t want him back. This was my closure.
Possibly if Johnny consulted his iPod, Sweet Dreams (are made of this) by the Eurythmics would come up. 😉
The mind is a mysterious thing. I think this dream tells you a lot. As all of those before me have said, you are making the choice in this dream and you are saying no. I think the A HA! Lighbulb moment (not the A HA band moment… cause only I have those moments) was when you said “It never would have been like I wanted it to be, would it?” and he shook his head. This tells you no matter how much love you have for this person, you realize it never will … be.
I used to dream about my ex – I had vivid reoccuring dreams about him being in another relationship before I found out he was in one; I had dreams where I was begging for him to take me back, etc.. The last dream I had of him, I didn’t want him back. This was my closure.
Possibly if Johnny consulted his iPod, Sweet Dreams (are made of this) by the Eurythmics would come up. 😉