Attacking Life with Comedic Jaws of Sarcasm. Recovering Dating & Relationship Blogger - Made it to Step 12 When I Got Married.

2005 ~ The Year in Review

I can’t take credit for this idea. One of my favorite bloggers utilized this end of year wrap up in her blog last year.

January – Started the new year off right. The morning of January 1, I left a guy’s house who I was sort of dating for almost a year, and despite how badly I wanted this to work, , we never saw each other again in a romantic setting. If we count him, he’s #1 in the lineup of men. Bought my condo in D.C. and prepared to finish the last days of life in the burbs (Rockville.)

February – Finally resigned from the hell that was my last job. One would think that things like discrimination and sexual harassment wouldn’t occur at one of the top five Nationally Ranked Homebuilders, but they did. And they went uncorrected, unresolved and unpunished. So I left. How dare anyone breathe the words “A woman should never make that much money.” Then I met Date #2 in 2005 Vicodin Stealing Derek, got ill, then became iller.

March – Couldn’t fight illness, coined “Satan’s Death Flu” by friends. Crawled to the ER and passed out on the floor. Finally recovered mid-month, but never recovered from fainting spells. Started new job with my fab boss who took me with him from hellacious homebuilder.

April – Moved into condo in D.C. after 3 ridiculous months prodding contractor to do some work. Went on one awful date with RestonDork (#3 date of 2005.) Also one date with Greek George (#4 of 2005.) Learned valuable lesson: The bigger the man, the smaller the…Damn it. Sorry, this is a dating blog, not a sex blog.

May – Went to London and Paris. Started seeing Mike (40 years old and going on 15.) Date #5 of 2005. We did see each other for a couple months.

June – Had some bad It’s Just Lunch dates which prompted me to give birth to this Blog. I went out with a IJLHater (Date #6) and a StanderUpper (Date #7.)

July – Met, got sucked into, and spit out of vortex called BoyFace (#8). Also dated HornyHungarian (Date #9.) More It’s Just Lunch dates included IJLLawyer (#10,) GreekFreak (#11) and DoubleDutch (#12.) Took motorcycle lessons. Bought Motorcycle. Met MotorcycleInstructor.

August – Dated MotorcycleInstructor. He would be #13. Also squeezed in a couple dates with the the first of the unnamed men, “R” (#14.) More It’s Just Lunch dates, HarleyRider (#15) and EmailBuddy (#16.)

September – Went out with the GreekWonder (#17.) Cutest baby in the world born on 24th. Became caught in the grip of lies created by MotorcycleInstructor.

October – Visited cutest baby in the world in Michigan. Met Bartender at Blogger Happy Hour, briefly dated. (He’s #18.) Got Death Flu again.

November – Who can forget Bell’s Palsy? Went out with Steve1 (#19) from online and Date Eight (#20 of the lineup) from It’s Just Lunch. Reconsidered using real names as part of my blog. Still reconsidering.

December – It’s Just Lunch sent me out with Date#9LowTalker (#21) and I went out with my personal trainer (#22) as well as CL#1Writer (#23,) CL#3TextTormenter (#24,) and CL#4NewJersey (#25.) He’s new. You will hear about him in an upcoming post.

I find it sad that I dated men with names that never overlapped with the exception of Mike. I dated 5 Mike’s this year, four of whom are disguised with other names. I dated 25 men in total for 2005. In any case, the score is as follows:

Velvet: 0
Potential Dating Pool: -25

Yes, it’s very sad to see the figures in the red, but there they stand. I was/am clearly in love with U-Street Metro. I felt like BoyFace could be the U-Street Metro replacement until I found out what a liar he was. I think that shook my faith in men and this thing we call dating. I know that there really are guys out there who are right for me, but it makes it hard to believe after the year I’ve had. Still, I plan to continue on, meeting, greeting, dating and hopefully mating in the future. I will bring the news to you, my lovely readers, as it occurs.

Here’s to hoping the dating news in 2006 will be brighter! Cheers!

1 Comment

  1. Velvet

    trueborn said…
    Well now.
    That’s quite a list.
    Keep going with the dating, the good ones are out there, they do exist. Here’s hoping that you find a great guy in 2006 who makes you forget the -25 from this year.
    Happy New Year.

    1/01/2006 03:35:16 PM

    chicgirl said…
    this is a great review for us newer regular readers, velvet. now i know what months to look at. And, i am hopeful a newer, better chris-type will meander into your world! You deserve it!

    1/01/2006 10:22:16 PM

    Velvet said…
    Trueborn – I’m not sure if I should set a goal to date, say, 30 men this year, or if I should be going the opposite direction – more of a “date 15 quality men” goal. Guess we’ll see.

    Chic Girl – I realized yesterday as I was listening to a Lenny Kravitz song where your email addy comes from! I would have linked the names of the guys to other parts of my blog, but something about linking to myself seems weird. Anyway, thanks for your support as I date away like a madwoman.

    1/01/2006 11:34:12 PM

    Siryn said…
    At least you put yourself out there, Velvet. It really IS a numbers game, and you unfortunately have to wade through a lot of shit before you find the right drama-free guy that CAN see into your soul.

    1/01/2006 11:35:55 PM

    Velvet said…
    Siryn – You continue to amaze me with your recollection of things I’ve said. You’re good. Perhaps we should date. Uh…wait. Scratch that.

    1/02/2006 01:05:56 AM

    AsianMistress said…
    Dear God you remember all your dates. Haha.

    I guess I can’t talk I remember (in list form) every guy I’ve kissed to had sex with.

    I’m really cool I know.

    1/02/2006 09:54:37 AM

    Reya Mellicker said…
    If she hasn’t already, Grateful Dating simply must award you a Ph. of D.ating. You are a force of nature! Bravo!!

    1/02/2006 11:03:57 AM

    playfulindc said…
    That list is why I went on tour…oh, not your list, but my own…i hope the real one for you is right around the corner, cause all of this would give me a hernia.

    1/02/2006 11:18:29 AM

    Velvet said…
    AM – They are burned in my brain. I try to forget but I can’t.

    Reya – Can I trade the PhD for a good man?

    Playful – Wait, you went on tour so you would have a list of something other than dating? Or you went on tour to get away from all the men?

    1/02/2006 01:22:50 PM

    Kristin said…
    What a year. Aunt-hood, home ownership, motorcycling and of course, the dating. Way to live.

    1/02/2006 05:08:04 PM

    Washington Cube said…
    Now you’ve got me curious about April/George the Greek, since I know a Greek George.

    1/02/2006 06:44:55 PM

    Velvet said…
    Kristin, yes. It’s been a full year.

    Cube, I emailed you a picture of him. He lives in Gaithersburg. Any chance it’s him? Don’t out me if it is. No man likes to hear they have a tiny you-know-what. I suspect he has taken too many steroids and that’s how that happened.

    1/02/2006 08:30:56 PM

    Barbara said…
    I’m not sure I have dated 25 guys in my entire lifetime, let alone in one year. I give you lots of credit for just keeping their names straight and for being able to put this chronology to your dating exploits! Maybe 2006 will produce the real winner — if that is what you are after…

    1/02/2006 09:05:35 PM

    Stef said…
    Velvet, you crack me up. I think you’re really courageous for putting yourself out there and really trying to be proactive in finding someone. Sorry you didn’t find him in 2005, but the process of elimination has to count for something, right??? I hope your stats are better for 2006. And I have a friend who’s totally overdosed on Mikes, so I’ve learned to stay away! 🙂

    1/02/2006 10:51:17 PM

    Velvet said…
    Barbara – Yes you have! 25 isn’t that many, or is it?

    Stef – Thank you! Me Too!!

    1/02/2006 10:51:23 PM

    Johnny said…
    Happy New Year!

    1/03/2006 06:49:04 AM

    Rhinestone Cowgirl said…
    Babe — Happy New Year. I have a feeling that 2006 is gonna be a good one. 🙂


    1/03/2006 07:50:49 AM

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