Attacking Life with Comedic Jaws of Sarcasm. Recovering Dating & Relationship Blogger - Made it to Step 12 When I Got Married.

When Love Makes This Sound…A Heart Needs A Second Chance

It has been an interesting few days to say the least. First, I have to say hello and apologize to my little friend, Roxy Chanel McPink. I’m not sure why, but through some crazy bullshit that can only be triggered by bloggers with nothing else to do but start trouble, she thought that I was mad at her and wrote part of my last post about her. We had an email exchange where I explained that that definitely wasn’t the case. She said she was in tears driving to work this morning. Oh no! Roxy! I’m sorry. Then she said, “Phew, because I knew you went to bat for me and I thought maybe I missed something and you needed me and I wasn’t there for you.” Damn. I love you. You are a cool chick. See? Friendship. It’s such an easy thing to maintain for some of us, isn’t it? Oh, and Roxy, a couple of the more, well, sad of the blogscene say “Dating Blogs are Sooooo over.” They think if they declare their dating blog finished on a Monday, then jump on someone else’s bandwagon the next day of the “Dating Blogs being Sooooo over” that they are like, cool or something. But, um, aren’t you writing a book and shit? Yeah. Not sure how something (like dating) that people will be doing for the rest of eternity can be “over” but whatever!! Anyway, on that note…

The Year of First Dates has come to a screeching halt. There are a few factors at work here. First, I sidelined a couple of players in the dating game because I got busy, then got the dreaded cold. So, the emails and phone calls continued, but then, I lost interest. Also, I realized, if I could meet someone as nice and witty as Fencer4, and not want to pursue it, it is because something else was at work. Yes. Yes. I know. You know. We all know. Why waste any more time?

I’m so stupidly ridiculously in love with Sherlock and so ready to move on from the Disasters of 2006. Seeing him again last weekend and feeling the way I did was really a shock. The second I put my eyes on him I thought, “Uh oh.” We spent the entire weekend together just staring at each other. The clickety click was back. The impact of everything we talked about over the weekend continued to hit me through the week. I really didn’t realize that any of this was going to happen. My head was so ready to move on and do the Year of First Dates. My heart? Not so much.

I’m in love. And I’m not sure what happens from here. Actually I know exactly what happens from here. We gots all sorts of plans. But the only plans that matter are that I’m fucking madly in love.


  1. Scarlet

    Yeah, it never works for the head and the heart to move separately.

  2. elvis

    Pobrecita. Better buckle up, put on your helmet, cowboy up. It’s ganna be a heckuva ride. Least you’ll be happy.

  3. Rachelle

    Awww, I’m glad you’ve finally come to that realization. It was so obvious!

    Congrats Velvet. I hope you guys are happy together!

  4. b

    Have you two ever thought of therapy?
    Honestly, I’m not trying to be mean or nuthin, but the dynamic you two have seems to repeat itself over and over in a disasterous way and it seems like Something must be done to break the cycle and I’m not so sure the two of you, alone, can make that happen.

    Seems to me there are a few underlying issues and if those could just be hashed out, BOOM: Happiness/Bliss = Together!

    Then again, this might hault all the fun of this rollercoaster you call blog entries 😉

    I’m pullin’ for you two, but honestly…think about it. If not therapy, something. I don’t charge much per hour =)

    Btw, LOVE LOVE LOVE the title of this entry

  5. bettyjoan

    It’s official–when you profess that you’re “fucking madly in love,” I need to meet the man responsible. 🙂

    Happy, happy, HAPPY for you! I didn’t want you to have to suffer through countless bad first dates anyway…despite the inevitable gut-busting laughter that would have resulted.

  6. Wicked H

    Just go with it. One day/plan at a time.

  7. Hedonistic Pleasureseeker

    I am so happy to hear this! You’re on the loooooove train . . . . . woot!

  8. *A*

    AWWWWWW Velvet I have the hugest smile right now…hang in there girl, love is a scary thing but it’s so worth it.
    If I may quote my fave movie (and blog headline) “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.”

  9. Big Tone

    And I thought I had a chance to be one of V’s First Dates.

  10. E :)

    *A*’s right. Great movie line. Now I’ve got it the song stuck in my head… Nicole Kidman sucks though – thank goodness for Ewan MacGregor.

    Ok. Back to the subject. Good for you! Love is hard. But I wish I were in love. It’s been a loooong time and one too many assholes!

  11. 6s & 7s

    awwww. *sniffle* how sweet.

    But does this mean you won’t be my man eating partner anymore? VELVET! I can’t go at it alone!

  12. Velvet

    Scarlet – I tried so hard though.

    Elvis – Thanks!

    Rachelle – HA! Obvious to everyone but me apparently!!

    B – I appreciate the sentiment because I know with you it comes from a good place. But, consider that a lot of our drama was fueled and stirred by outside forces who are no longer an issue to us and who just wanted to be entertained. The song title by the way is from Second Chance – 38 Special.

    BJ – And you will. Definitely. We all live close, we should do dinner. But not where you work! HA HA! Somewhere else!

    Wicked H – I’m trying!

    Hedonistic – It’s been a long train ride, but I’m glad it’s taken this turn.

    *A* – Thank you!!

    Big Tone – HA! You should have sent me an email during the very abbreviated “Year of First Dates.”

    E:) – Thank you, and you’ll get there. I’ve been in love before, but it’s always different.

    6’s & 7’s – Oh, you won’t have to go at it alone. Sherlock’s good at staying home with the dogs while I go out and get wasted. He likes it. (Okay maybe “like” isn’t the right word… maybe “happily tolerates” is better.)

  13. Fencer4

    Heh. Glad I could help.
    Congratulations and condolences

  14. Velvet

    Fencer4 – HA HA! You hush up. I’ve got plans for you that are not of the self-serving variety!!

  15. carrie m

    i was hoping to pick off of your date scraps, *now* what am i going to do?! 😉

    seriously, i didn’t know the L word was involved! that’s awesome, babe!

  16. DCVita

    January is not even over yet and I am done with the year of first dates too. Screw that! You are lucky though! I want the ‘uh-oh’ look badly! (maybe from one guy in particular..but that is besides the point ;P

  17. The Captain

    I’ve done the going back thing before. Let’s just say I hope it works out better for you.

  18. Velvet

    Carrie M – Yeah, we’ve been at the L word for some time. And I thought it was out of my system, but nope. It’s not.

    DC Vita – The year of first dates was going to be a long year, but it would have been fun, I think.

    The Captain – As I said to B, we had a lot of trauma fueled by others, so, now that that stuff is all out of the picture, we can move on with just the two of us in this relationship instead of everyone else.

  19. H-word

    Hi, random comment I wanted to put out there about your last post, seems like someone has hacked VK’s blog and put a graphic porn link instead. Not to start drama, but I figured you’d get a laugh out of that. I had to share it.

    Good luck with Sherlock!

  20. mysterygirl!

    Good luck, Velvet! 🙂

  21. freckledk

    6’s & 7’s – I’m always “hungry.” You take the Nerds and I’ll take the Jackasses.

    But Velvet is right, Sherlock is always more than happy to stay home while she wreaks havoc all over DC. She probably is more available IN a relationship than she would have been going on all of those first dates.

  22. Elizabeth

    Say hello to my little friend……(I knew a few entries back that there was a good chance we would go on a fun ride and come full circle back to Sherlock..)I’m in love, too…so I recognized some can’t fight your heart..rumor has it that when you ignore your heart you turn into a bitter boob talking chit about dating blogs being so over…you’ve been warned..I bet Sherlock is a great guy. TGIF Velvet….I am happy for you!

  23. Tacoma

    What? I’m SHOCKED! Shocked I tell you:)
    I’m Very happy for you.
    I guess I need to find a new dating blog– because I’m NOT ready to start reading mommy blogs.

  24. Patsy

    Well, I GUESS I’ll be happy for you. As long as he’ll dogsit so I can play with you!

  25. Momentary Academic

    Well. It is marvelous that you are in love. Even though we’ve just met, I think that this is absolutely fantastic! Mr. Sherlock’s very lucky to be able to be with such a firecracker (and I mean that in all the best ways)!

    Please don’t crawl into a whole and forget about your new acquaintances. Because I for one would like to hang out again. You’re neat!


  26. Momentary Academic

    Haha. Obviously, I’ve not learned how to spell. hole. hahahaha.

  27. Drunken Chud

    back on the rollercoaster! wheeeeeeee! hope the ride is better this time.

  28. Laura

    We should all be so lucky. I’m rooting for you!

  29. Not Over

    Good post. A few people stop blogging, to much trumpeting and fanfare, and then all of a sudden they declare blogging uncool. That doesn’t mean the rest of us who want to be real writers won’t continue to use our lives as our material. There are plenty of great blogs out there. Whatsername didn’t exactly leave the gaping hole she thinks she did.

  30. Barbara

    First of all, it looks like I missed out on one of the biggest Blog discussions in history on the Kindergarten post. Since I can’t comment there any longer, I will say — Whew! I would not want to be on your shit list — evah!

    As for Sherlock, love him if it feels good. You are in control and we are just along for the ride to see what happens! And from recent past history, there is no predicting this one…

  31. Tacoma

    Not over- Jesus, Do you have anything else to write about?


    Then Congratulate Lover Girl!

  32. Tyler

    Wow… I didn’t really see this coming. But Congrat’s, I hope things work out better this time around!

  33. Velvet

    H-Word – Any good porn on that site? I believe the blogger in question moved his site and when you delete a blog, it quickly becomes a place for ads. I’m not sure how they do it, but these companies hop on to the URL and once your blog gets deleted, they take them over. If I deleted my blogspot blog, it would probably become an ad page for vibrators, or online dating!

    MysteryGirl! – Thank you!!

    FreckledK – You are right. I’m more available now. That point is on the money.

    Elizabeth – HA! Awesome! Thank you for your kind words, and it’s funny that you saw it, as did some others, but I didn’t. Not in a million years.

    Tacoma – What? Mommy blogs? Ha ha! Want me to write about Sammy and Thora more? They slept all day today. Fun stuff. Oh, Sammy snored! There you go! Riveting.

    Patsy – He promised to dogsit, so yeah baby, I’m comin!!

    Momentary Academic – I love your follow up comment about not being able to spell hole! I have a dirty mind..very dirty. And thank you. We do need to get out there and rip it up some more. This time I’ll behave! Okay, maybe not.

    Chud – Me too. If not, I’m coming to Detroit bitch. Make room for me.

    Laura – Thank you!

    NotOver – Hmm. You are an interesting commenter. I’m not sure which “whatshername” you are referring to, but I think we are poking fun at different people. Anyway, I agree wholeheartedly with what you say – it’s one thing to walk away from it, another to declare it “uncool” just because you think it is, or want it to be. Just because everyone was wearing skinny jeans this year and I was still in my low rise bootcuts, doesn’t mean I’m uncool. Cause guess what happened when they all realized they couldn’t keep their stomachs sucked in for 10 hours in those skinny jeans? They all came running back to my way! HA! See? Also, I’d love to know who you are…love it.

    Barbara – Please understand that it takes A LOT to get on my shitlist. In many of those cases, I, or someone I know, was a VERY GOOD friend to another blogger, only to have that blogger do something horrible in response that doesn’t scream friendship in the least. That’s the part that I cannot and will not abide by – and while some of what I said may have been harsh, or that those involved didn’t see it coming, it still needed to be said. As I’ve told others during their “blog wars,” usually it is best to not get involved and not respond, but sometimes? You have to let people know that you know what they are doing and you won’t tolerate their shit. And that’s just what I did. And that post wasn’t about 14 different people – there were only about 5 represented there.

    Tacoma – Aww. I’m lover girl! HA HA!

    Tyler – They will. Knock on wood. Once I eliminated the trash and background noise, everything started to improve tremendously.

  34. Krista

    I love it!! Though the dating stories were funny, at this point, I just wanted you to be with Sherlock. You know, as a complete stranger, I’m glad you read my thoughts. Congrats!

  35. bejeweled

    Welcome to the club.

  36. Shopgirlove

    Girl, in the immortal words of my Auntie Liz: Watch out for men, they smell good. If he’s worthy, fine…if he’s not, call me. You deserve everything. Never compromise!

  37. CosmicGoof

    Love Rules! Hey Handy Mandy is 4.5 Months pregnant, thought you should know.

  38. KassyK

    Just saw this and I am so happy for you. 🙂

  39. Drunken Chud

    there’s always room for you here. watch your back sherlock!

  40. Luck O' the Irish

    Two words: WOO HOO! This is great and I’m so happy for you!

  41. playfulinnc

    I know…I’ve been too consumed in gowns to notice, but I can’t say I’m suprised.

    Soo happy to hear this news~

  42. Red

    Don’t talk about Sherlock here cause you know what happens.

    To the rest of ya:
    If she does talk about Sherlock you can only speak of it here. No more messing them up and getting involved. It is not our business outside of the blog unless otherwise specified by those in the so-called relationship.

    Oh, and you weren’t trying that hard with the dating cause Sherlock-on-the-mind was getting in the way. I have something else in my way and I wouldn’t trade that either… Mini Red.

    Love to ya Sistah!

  43. chicgirl

    I have not been reading much lately
    I am soooo happy for you – this is great news:) I wish you only good things miss velvet!

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