Attacking Life with Comedic Jaws of Sarcasm. Recovering Dating & Relationship Blogger - Made it to Step 12 When I Got Married.

Having a Baby is Impossible – Part 2

I really appreciate everyone’s thoughts, comments and well wishes. Because the blog reposts to my Facebook, I had the chance to catch up with people who I haven’t chatted with in years, when the post was plastered on my wall.

What is amazing is how many people I know have been touched by fertility issues. It makes me wonder what is so different now from 40, 100, 1000 years ago when there were no assisted reproductive techniques. What did people do? Because damn if that waiting room at Dominion wasn’t filled every time we went there. It makes me wonder if the stresses of life are just too much for people to provide the right environment for conception, or if this is just a medical scam.

This is clearly big business. In hindsight, perhaps we should have stuck with Shady Grove. One of my friends commented as much, and I wanted to actually address this with a proper answer. Shady Grove was our first stop. My brain could not get around the idea that we would have to do IVF when there was only a vasectomy in the way. It’s like driving down the road, seeing a pothole, and instead of driving around it you stop the car and get in an airplane to fly over it. It just seemed extreme, and that there were a bunch of stops along the way to full blown IVF.

What I also hated about Shady Grove was before X and I got our asses to touch the visitor’s chairs in their office, they were pulling out this laminated card with their 60% success rate statistics. It felt like an infomercial.   What I also don’t like about them is that they don’t do Natural Cycle IVF, but if you google natural cycle, Shady Grove is most often first, with a link to the page where they discuss why they don’t think Natural Cycle IVF is worth shit. Yeah, well, obviously that article was written by someone with a penis because any woman who takes all those hormones in the stomach for 3 weeks would never write something so ridiculous.

Washington Fertility was no different. They also reported about a 60% success rate, but I don’t believe them. If he retrieved 15 eggs from me and got a big fat zero, then he’s not doing so well. Especially considering another clinic proved I have healthy, viable eggs with no issues. But back to hindsight being 20/20, I’m willing to bet dollars to donuts that if I went through the cycle with Shady Grove and they got 15 eggs, there would have been a baby by now.

I saw three separate doctors after the latest IVF. This wasn’t my choice, but what happened in the procedure necessitated it. I truly do not wish this misery on my worst enemy. I cannot find any evidence online of people having their bladder punctured during an IVF cycle, but of course, if you told me that there would be a million procedures this year and during retrieval one patient would get struck by lightening through the window – that person would be me.

Someone pointed out either here or on Facebook something which X and I have already beaten ourselves up over. We wasted 2 years with these doctors. Two years. Doctors are not Gods. They don’t know it all. Some of them don’t know shit. You have to take hold of your own healthcare and make your own decisions, and you have to question everything. It seems like they recently lowered the bar for graduating from med school because I never remember doctors being this inept when I was growing up. Or maybe I was just seeing the world through different eyes.


  1. JohnnyDC

    I think 100 years ago, they made you eat wildeberries and other wierd stuff.

    Hope you get preggo soon.

  2. Siryn

    This is what I don’t understand. If you have healthy, viable eggs with no issues, why do you have to go under IVF? You endured this horror show because he doesn’t have enough sperm. Does not compute.

  3. Velvet

    Siryn, I don’t know either. The answer is because he doesn’t have enough “mature” sperm. Allegedly, it’s not mature when it’s extracted, but if it goes through the tunnels that be, then it matures in the process. Regardless, the body doesn’t produce enough post-vasectomy. At least this is what we were led to believe by the 3 clinics in question.

  4. Siryn

    I feel like this is all bullshit. IVF is, supposedly, for when YOU are infertile, not HIM. If you could presumably get pregnant by another man, because your eggs are fine, then why the fuck do you have to do IVF? I smell a scam by all those mf’s.

  5. Siryn

    I’m not going to give false hope but people’s bodies recover after traumatic experiences – Lance Armstrong had a kid when he didn’t expect it because God healed his body enough to do it. Same thing happened for my brother, who you know had cancer. Doctors tell them that they’ll never have kids again, but oops, they’re not God. It’s entirely possible that you can have a child naturally without the aid of the baby factory people. It’s not out of the realm of the possible, and I will pray that God intervenes where these shysters couldn’t.

  6. Wicked H


    We talked privately a while ago and I am disheartened to see that things have not taken an upswing.

    Having worked with physicians for over 20 years, I tend to blame the constraints of managed care rules and regs for the incompetency of todays generation of physicians. That is in no way an excuse for what is happening to you.

    I told you back when we were e-mailing each other that you should take all appropriate actions against any medical provider who has committed malpractice; its the only way to weed out the heard of quacks.

    I sincerely hope the bladder puncture is something you can heal from soon. As well as hoping you get the baby you both want.

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