We’ve had an incredible turn of events over here in dating-land. It seems that BoyFace, Mr. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before in my life Velvet” is out cruising the personals looking for yet more girls. Aren’t I enough?? I mean, come on, really. BoyFace sent my good friend Diane an email today. Unfortunately for me, he said the exact same things to her that he said to me. Interesting. And unfortunately for him, Diane is my friend. She used some ridiculous pictures of the most beautiful girl she could find. This is great.

Armed with this information, I went to Mercury Grill last night to have a drinky-poo with Sara, Blondie, Boston and BestGuyFriend-M. When they asked me how I was and I told them what was going on, the night unveiled an amazing amount of ideas. They are so excited to have some fun with this fucker. As am I. As is Diane. She has been writing back to BoyFace. And he’s got these canned phrases that he says that are such BULLSHIT! Some of what he’s saying to her is even my cute cheeky little vocabulary. Take for instance my liberal use of the phrase, “I have a secret to tell you.” He fucking used that on her! Damn! Macking on my lines now. How could I be so stupid to believe all of his crap? I might have to resign from the dating world. I’m REALLY bad at this. But, I’m going to start posting all the exchanges so you can read them. They are too too too hilarious.

The GreekFreak called me last night but I was out and the sounds of the bar and the music were too much to deal with so it gave me a great excuse to say “Listen, I’m out, can I call you back?” I will call back…uh….never.

Read the title of today’s blog again. It’s funny. I can’t stop giggling. It’s on. Let’s roll.