Attacking Life with Comedic Jaws of Sarcasm. Recovering Dating & Relationship Blogger - Made it to Step 12 When I Got Married.

It’s a Perfect Passion and I Can’t Get Enough

First, a PSA. A blog friend needs a roommate. Details here.

Now, loose ends.

CL#3TextTormenter won’t stop. In the score of Velvet vs. TextTormenter, it’s Zero to Five. He’s made 2 unreturned phone calls to me and sent 3 texts, also unreturned by moi. Saturday night I decided to put this poor bastard out of his misery. He texted: “What are you up to tonight?” Before I knew of NewJersey’s delayed plane I said, “Waiting on a friend.” (It’s my favorite Stones song.) He said, “Cool.” I didn’t write back. I know, I messed up. He’s not gone. But he’s definitely doing some circular floating near the bottom of the drain.
CL#2BlueEyes and I had a date scheduled for Friday. I canceled it because I was seriously tired from Dallas. And on Friday I was busy emailing NewJersey anyway so my dirty little mind was elsewhere. CL#2BlueEyes sends back a RANT about, well, let me just post it. The disclaimer on this is that he’s canceled dates as well. We’re like, 2 for 2 on date canceling with each other. Ok, the email:

  • No problem. I mean, what’s it been, only like a few months of flirtation? And besides, maybe you weren’t that impressed at lunch. And tomorrow it is supposed to snow so we can count out the weekend, which will put us into next week when I have work and plans and you have plans and work and Valentine’s Day hits and then maybe we can talk some more on the phone and on email and don’t forget IM and discuss our dating lives and porn and get hot and bothered and not actually ever do anything about it. But don’t worry ’cause I can be free again in March or April or even May if that’s cool with you.

Uh….huh. So I hopped on IM and said, “WTF?” and he said he was just having a bad day. He said he needed to check out of town for a while or something similarly off the wall. We left it at that.

Sunday night he sent me this email:

  • Hey just a line to apologize for my truly unusual (and I know you really have no frame of reference for this with me yet, so I’m doubly sorry) behavior on Friday. I was honestly partially disappointed at not getting to see you because I have enjoyed it so far but there was some other major shit going down that I just don’t want to get into. Nothing mysterious but it was really frustrating. Here’s hoping I haven’t become one of your great bad date stories already…

I know I know. If he only knew….So, I wrote back the following on Monday afternoon:

  • Hi BlueEyes, I saw this email last night and I thought about responding, but I wasn’t sure what to say. So I decided to sleep on it.Unfortunately, I woke up this morning really no better off. I have no answer, no reasoning, no excuses other than to say that I’m not feeling this. It’s probably a combination of a few things, but the biggest being the email you sent. I understand you meant no harm by it, but it just shows me that you are more intense a personality than I can handle. Sorry. Velvet.

And I got this back.

  • Thanks for writing me back to explain where you are. I’m just not the kind of guy who is going to lobby you or anything but at the same time I know you’re simply not reading the situation correctly to judge me by one email, even a fairly nutty one sent right after we just met in person. Still, that of course is your prerogative.

Velvet’s calling it: Time of Death: 1:56 p.m. on 2/13/06. _____________________________________________
NewJersey is BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK! (I feel like I’m standing at the window jumping up and down when I say that.) He called Sunday evening to announce his arrival, and said he could be convinced, tired as he was, to come over. But, then he asked me to do something this week and I said yes and there you go. When the idea came back up a second time of seeing each other tonight, I said “I really could have convinced you to come over here?” He said yes I could. I left it that it was his choice. He was silent on his end of the phone, then he started laughing under his breath. I said, “What are you thinking?” He said, “Bad things. We’re better off doing something this week.” We wrapped it up and he said, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

I feel like we’re moving along. Finally. It…was…so…slow…and…painful…to…get…here. But the train is pulling off from the station and I’m on it. I hope NewJersey is as well.

I’ve got a little problem too. Eventually the blog world and the NewJersey world are going to collide. I don’t know what to do about it. It’s time to start getting my ducks in a row though, and that may mean sparing some details here, in the name of privacy. I’m not foolish enough to forsake a good relationship for a blog, but I’m not sure where the happy medium is. I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.

1 Comment

  1. Velvet

    SomeGuyInDC said…
    Thanks for posting my need for a roommate Velvet. Craig’s List = Pain. I owe you one.

    2/13/2006 10:49:36 PM

    Velvet said…
    Tsk Tsk SomeGuy. Craigslist = Boyfriends for Velvet.

    2/13/2006 10:57:25 PM

    always write said…
    Well if you’ve ever taken a train through Jersey you know it can be hard to tell where you are and easy to get lost. Congrats on finally getting your bearings with the Garden State boy. (I think I’ve sufficiently run this metaphor into the ground.)

    2/13/2006 11:04:27 PM

    AsianMistress said…
    I think most of us bloggers are pretty quiet about how we know each other until we know it’s OK to be open about it. I usually go for “bar friends” or “met through friends” – because nobody ever questions that one.

    Much like online dating. 😉

    2/13/2006 11:12:20 PM

    Sandra Dee said…
    Hell the eff yeah!! Sooooo exciiiited about NewJersey!!

    2/13/2006 11:25:38 PM

    Siryn said…
    As you said yesterday, “fucking finally.”

    Let’s see if he’s worth the trouble!!

    2/13/2006 11:51:51 PM

    Stef said…
    Glad you’re doing a little house-cleaning…. and I’m looking forward to finding out as much as you can share about how Mr. NJ turns out! 🙂

    2/13/2006 11:59:53 PM

    Mandy said…
    Re: BlueEyes…um…After blowing up on you, I don’t think he really deserves to get pissy about you not putting up with it. Big ol’ whatever there. But HURRAH about NJ! Good luck, and keep us posted. As much as your modesty and discretion will allow, that is.


    2/14/2006 12:53:25 AM

    meghansdiscontent said…
    I think my heart stopped.
    Velvet, girl!
    New Jersey is the place to be.
    Who wudda thunk it?

    What’s next? I have to stop making Bronx jokes?

    2/14/2006 01:24:27 AM

    I-66 said…
    Kudos for telling BlueEyes what was going on.

    I’m always for the up front-ness.
    Then again, that seems to come easily for you.

    Onward and upward.

    2/14/2006 08:23:06 AM

    Washington Cube said…
    :::passing popcorn bowl:::
    :::throwing popcorn at I-66:::

    2/14/2006 08:40:12 AM

    Larissa said…
    you might have to change your comments link name from ‘Disaster Dates’ they seem to be going along pretty well now 🙂

    2/14/2006 08:53:53 AM

    Sub Girl said…
    i’m partial to Garden State boys myself….;)

    2/14/2006 09:44:34 AM

    I-66 said…
    unprovoked attack!

    [plotting revenge]

    2/14/2006 10:31:21 AM

    Johnny said…
    why do you think every goon on Capitol Hill and the MilIndustrialCIA industry uses acronym. Because TMI on the SO could be serious FUBAR!!!

    Or you could just say douchebag relenetlessly.

    2/14/2006 10:35:01 AM

    Velvet said…
    I66 and Cube: Do you kids need a time out? It’s V-Day! Be all about love and crap.

    To all – I’m not going to stop posting or anything. I just think it’s in poor taste to copy and paste his emails in here. So I’ll do the paraphrasing to get the point across. Never fear. I won’t hold back any stories!

    2/14/2006 10:41:48 AM

    BC said…
    I’m glad that you’re having more luck with CL guys than I did! Enjoy the ride (wink).

    2/14/2006 10:59:37 AM

    Elvis said…
    Good God, this is a great pulp nonfiction! Everytime I think you’re taking us somewhere, BOOM, well, there we are, somewhere else. This is my new Couple of unsolicted thoughts — Jersey boy shoulda just gone over, tuned in, dropped out, made love and peace. In fact, he shoulda just shown up on your front door and said, “literally, I didn’t even stop by baggage claim.” Seriously, now that the Super Bowl has kicked off, you shouldn’t feel bad about skimping out on sideline reports. Most of your fans really only want to know one thing — Where in New York did the Jeffersons live?

    2/14/2006 11:11:16 AM

    I-66 said…
    I dunno, Velvet.

    I think she just wants to fight so we can make up.

    2/14/2006 11:47:12 AM

    Kristin said…
    Aren’t you gonna say you’re glad you started things back up with a text? I’m happy for ya.

    2/14/2006 11:56:09 AM

    Velvet said…
    No Kristin! I can’t rob that line from another post. It cheapens it. And I’m not about things that are cheap.

    Uh. I’ll shut up now.

    I66 and Cubie sitting in a tree…k-i-s-s-i-n-g

    Elvis – the east side. A Deeelux apartment in the sky.

    2/14/2006 12:06:36 PM

    I-66 said…
    I can’t imagine a tree would be a very comfortable place to actually do that. Why didn’t anyone ever give that any consideration?

    2/14/2006 12:41:52 PM

    ~Mel said…
    velvet, I found your blog thru Kristin (over at CandySandwich) and I can’t tell you how much I enjoy this.

    Loving the tales with NJ… hope all goes well.

    by the by, stories of El Guapo and how he effed with John – pricelss!

    2/14/2006 12:47:22 PM

    annie said…
    Calling “the time of death” on it. Really funny, in a painful kind of way.

    Waiting to hear more about NJ…

    2/14/2006 03:05:56 PM

    Crazy Girl City said…
    Good job throwing the freak-o response guy away.

    2/14/2006 03:08:55 PM

    Washington Cube said…
    Happy Valentine’s Day, Miss Velvet.

    2/14/2006 04:18:39 PM

    I-66 said…
    I’m hiding in the bushes awaiting the opportunity to exact revenge upon cube for the unprovoked popcorn assault. Her comeuppance is coming.. uppance.

    2/14/2006 04:35:19 PM

    Kayla said…
    V, I think this sh*t is tight. (I love that phrase and even though it really makes no sense here, I thought i would post it anyway.. I mean, I am comment #29 or #30 or something… does anyone even read that far down)… Speaking as a follower of the Tao of V, I would like to say that it’s ok to withhold some things… Cherish them for your own. I have always had a soft spot for New Jersey… 😉 … When you run out of dating woes (as we all should), you can start posting about mine.. 😉

    2/14/2006 05:14:24 PM

    Barbara said…
    Probably a good decision on your part to not tell all about NJ in your Blog, although you’d better tell me in e-mail since I’ve been a NJ backer since the beginning. I’m SO glad this is moving along in the right direction. So what will you Blog about if it comes down to NJ and you’re not talking?

    2/14/2006 09:20:38 PM

    Johnny said…
    Velvet, can we talk about the lack of pole in your panties? We got a get strategarizing! I’m sure if we put our heads together, we can lick this problem! :p

    2/15/2006 08:03:46 AM

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