Attacking Life with Comedic Jaws of Sarcasm. Recovering Dating & Relationship Blogger - Made it to Step 12 When I Got Married.


Seven years ago from today, I started Velvet in Dupont. At that time, the focus was on being newly single and dating again while living in a nice gay neighborhood like Dupont Circle.

I wish I knew then…blah blah blah.

After a couple years of sheer misery, I finally connected with X, who I had known for years, and we packed it in for the long haul.   What I learned about living a life publicly is that it’s fine when it’s just you, but when you have other people to consider, revealing what’s going on in your life is tough for them. They didn’t sign up for it, but are just being taken along for the ride. Lucky for me, X has thick skin and he’s a good sport.

Coming out about our infertility struggle was especially difficult. It was over a year before enough had happened that I just had to talk about it. I like to think that our years of dealing with DC area fertility clinics, some of which are clearly very incompetent, was beneficial to at least one person who read about it here.

X and I are coming up on our 2nd anniversary but we will experience a milestone more important before that day.

We are days away from welcoming our first child into the world.

I know, I know, how could I keep this from everyone. Well, I kept waiting for something to go wrong. I suddenly felt like shielding this part of my life from the public – just in case. We’re about to be responsible for another life and I have a few thoughts about that. First, we have to protect that life to the ends of the earth. Second, we have to use whatever means necessary to do so.

I had to reevaluate some relationships in my life and really give them a thorough once-over. I had to have some conversations like, “I know we’re friends but if this behavior continues, I’ll have to move on.” And I had to really look at some family relationships to determine – is it even worth it anymore? Some of those relationships sadly didn’t survive either. It was my version of nesting I suppose.

It’s been a wonderful seven years, but we’re pleased to begin the next chapter in more privacy. You can always get me by email at



  1. Washington Cube

    First of all, congratulations. I was just talking to Patrick of DC Blogs about you the other day, and he was voicing he wished you were still writing (such skill, etc.) I do hope you remain in touch. If you are on Twitter or Facebook, let me know. You can always reach me at or that name under Twitter or Facebook. I have just started cranking up the WC blog again. Baby steps. (I had to say it.)

    I had a longstanding friend blast me this past weekend because I wouldn’t do what she wanted. I’ve arrived at the same conclusions you have. Studying how my friends act around me, or toward me, evaluating, and making some serious decisions. One thing that has changed over time with me, “If you have to let go, on either side, then you let go” and move on. I’ve seen this so much in the past few weeks…or heard of it with others.

    Anyway, I wish you would continue to blog, but I understand your decision totally. I’ve missed hearing from you. I know others have. Your impending baby is the best news I’ve had in some time.

  2. Allezoop

    So excited for you and X! I’m sad that the blog must end, but no one can reasonably expect for you to keep it going given how your life has and will continue to change. Although Tim and I are just doggy parents, I think I would be interested to see you tear apart the world of entitled parents and mommy bloggers at some point. (Not that all mommy bloggers are entitled jerks – some are hilarious – the Bloggess comes to mind.) Just a thought.

  3. Jessica

    Congratulations! And I second the idea that you would be excellent at scrutinizing the world of entitled parents. Best wishes for you and the soon-to-be-expanded X clan!

  4. Tyler

    So exciting!!!

    No Mommy blog for you?? 😉

  5. WordNerd

    Congratulations! Sending all the best to you, X and your baby!

  6. Carla Runs the World

    You know I enjoy your blog, and I’m so so so happy for your baby (as I am currently trying for my own).

    Please keep me updated if you start blogging again in the future! I always loved your honesty, even if I didn’t always agree with everything.

  7. Phil

    Congratulations – you are entering a club that is sometimes thankless, sleepless, all consuming, but often rewarding. It isn’t easy, but nothing good really is. The Playaz wish you the best.

  8. Leah

    Velvet, during the past several months of quiet here in Dupont Circle, I’d often wondered if you and X had been blessed and were enjoying the whole messy, uncomfortable, amazing process. Thank you for allowing your readers to experience the best part of any story… a happy ending.

    (If you ever decide to write a sequel, please let me know. You’re insights on parenting would be priceless, I’m sure.)

  9. Dara

    I love your happy ending, and you already know that I am so so SO excited for you and X and baby.

    But I also miss your writing. Please don’t stop, even if it’s not here.

  10. IcyAll


  11. suicide_blond

    congrats kid…
    allllll the best… youre gonna be great at this…
    give x and bebe xxxtra hugs and kisses from this auntie!!

  12. Jill

    The best news ever and so happy for you!! I will miss your blog but there are some things that are ok to keep private. Enjoy your newest addition!

  13. Keady

    LOVE you so much, my friend! I can’t wait for the arrival of your +1 for you and X. Promise me you’ll call me if you need anything. I am among those hoping you’ll be a kickass mommyblogger, but leave that decision up to you.

  14. I-66

    Oh my. Well congratulations on your most recent steps forward in life. All the best.

  15. Kerrie

    Congrats! Glad to hear you got your happy ending. Best of luck to the three of you!

  16. jcd

    Many congratulations from a longtime lurker and sometime commenter! I’m really happy for you. Best wishes for the future.

  17. Donna

    I’m going to miss you. Big time. I am happy for you, even though I knew you were preggers!! I love you three and I am going to miss you Lady V.

  18. Amy h

    I am so happy for you and X! You will have a blast, I’m sure!

    I don’t know if you remember, but you encouraged me to start trying asafp if I thought I wanted a kid, and now we are entering our first round of IVF (after one failed IUI attempt). I really appreciate all of your advice and technical info about the process. We have a great doctor and I am very hopeful.

    I have missed your writing so much. I am so sad to see this blog end, but like everyone else, I hope you will continue to write. Maybe someday there will be Velvet, the book.

    I wish you and X all the happiness in the world!

  19. Jenn

    HURRAH!!!! Congrats! I am so happy for you and Mr. X!!

  20. Siryn

    Very happy to hear that you and X are moving into a new phase with a new baby. Congratulations and best of luck going forward.

  21. Cyndy

    I’m so very happy for you and X and your new baby! I’ll miss your writing but you are definitely going to have your hands full for quite a while! Best wishes, Cyndy

  22. Ben


  23. Bilious C. Pudenda

    I hope X is a nice Greek boy.
    You know, for my sake.
    Congratulations Velvet.

  24. Home I'mprovement Ninja

    It’s been a while since I blogged or commented. These java script boxes look weird to me now. I guess you really are moving on to bigger and better things. I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since you posted.

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