Look what showed up in my fake email inbox today:
I would like to extend an invitation to you to join a brand new group, if you qualify.
This is group formed primarily for people on craigslist personals as well as other online personals sites, who have often been frustrated and found it a waste of time. Yes, this will come across as elitist, and perhaps may even offend some. I dont really give two hoots. This group is designed for only the beautiful people. And membership is going to be strictly open to only those that meet a minimum criteria of attractiveness. You have to be physically fit, look great, and have a great personality. See that way, we can organise parties and events, and everyone will be happy. So who is the judge you might ask. For starters, it will be me, and then when we have enough people, we can form a small panel to decide whether to admit someone or not. And I will be looking for like minded people. I will also make sure we maintain a 50-50 gender ratio, so that our parties and events will be fun and well balanced. So if you are interested to join, and think you are eligible to be counted amongst the hip and beautiful, send me an email with a clear picture and description of yourself, with a few words as to why you believe in the concept.
Click on the link below and submit your application for membership.
group website : http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lovelyonesveryeligible/
email me at : firstname.lastname@example.org
and yes…(Please, dont send me mails about beauty being in the eye of the beholder, blah blah blah, or save the flames if you are upset, its not going to faze me.. And I know there are enough of us out there who have wasted enough time with CL to appreciate this endeavour)LOVE – Lovely Ones & Very Eligible
This email address might provide more entertainment than the Paris Hilton email (which by the way, I never fully utilized.) Please, I urge you, send the ugliest pictures you can find to this group who really seems to have prioritized their values in the most interesting of ways. I think I’m going to respond, just to see if I’m accepted. HA!_____________________________________________
I went to the Blogger Happy Hour last night. Much fun was had by all. I’m unable to go through the whole list of everyone I spoke with, so I’m sorry! I got a chance to talk to Barbara and Reya for a bit, and it was nice to put faces to blogs. I found the funniest part of the evening was when Playful in D.C. told me that THE BARTENDER asked her if she knew of my blog. When she replied “yes,” he pointed at himself and said, “I’m the Bartender.” He has given narcissist a whole new definition. Ok, it’s funny. I can really pick ’em.
CL#1Writer called me again tonight as I was leaving the Blogger Happy Hour and still standing on Columbia Road with Jamy and Always Write (who I don’t want to “out” by using her name, just in case.) Last night when he called, he left a message. Tonight he didn’t leave one. So I’m perturbed that he told me Sunday to call him this week. Then he calls Tuesday and leaves a message. Ok, fine. But calling tonight, not leaving a message and then I find an email when I get home. It’s a little much. So now I have to just cut it off. I want to use the “you’re a great guy but I am not feeling it” line. We’ll see how that goes. I need to do it soon.
CL#2BlueEyes – haven’t heard back from him again. He can simmer on the back burner for a bit while I get to the bottom of what’s up with these other two.
CL#3TextTormenter – We’re talking about meeting tonight. He’s in girlfriend mode. I can tell. I’m putting the bait out and throwing the line.
I was never too successful at having multiple real relationships going on at the same time. I would be afraid of getting their names mixed up in the heat of passion! Do you screen them out immediately if they don’t like dogs?!
Yes, they are bounced if they don’t like dogs or if they are allergic!
Barbara! I don’t say names during sex!!! Never have.
If you liked him, I could introduce you to a few like him, just a bit older with less hair knowledge.
It was great to meet you!
I totally want to see if I’m good enough to make their list… I might have to work on creating a snazzy fake profile now!